2020 was hard, in fact, unbelievable for me. My husband passed away. I was home alone, very alone. I was not working my usual ...well, I was not working much at all. 2020 had all the ingredients for depression and despair for me.
I was surrounded with love and hope from friends, community and family, of course. But at the heart of me is a huge drive to be productive, make a difference and contribute to the world. It was an impossible thing- while navigating my husbands failing health - and I felt this struggle singularly upon me, too.
Except for a small spark. A small glimmer of hope from a new friend. A friendship that led to busy-ness and projects. That friend was Elizabeth (yes, Hamilton-Guarino.. the one and only). We became online friends in January and by February, we knew that we had stumbled into something special. Something rare, unique and life-long.
We connected on so many levels, personal, emotional, values.. but also on a career level. While on my rollercoaster of cancer, financial strain, loneliness and uncertainty, Elizabeth became a grounding force and beacon of light for me. We started projects, planning and writing together, and her grace for me was a gift beyond measure.
If I needed a day to do nothing, she was there for me.
If I could muster the strength to write, she embraced it.
If I needed to cry, she was a shoulder.
If I needed encouragement, it was gentle.
The fact that I found this incredible friend at this exact moment is a beautiful thing alone. Now add that we published (yes) and went to #1 Amazon Best Seller (double yes!) with our first journal (2 weeks before Ben passed away) in July and you cannot imagine my joy. It warms my heart even more that Ben got to see our accomplishment and celebrate with me.
The first journal means so much to me because of it's story. I feel like it is the piece that connects me to Ben- still cheering me on and reminding me that I will be okay. And one day, much more than okay again. I'm on my way, in 2021. Stepping back into my own light. Reminding myself what we can accomplish if we just keep going, even on hard days, even when we stop for a while. We can accomplish what we put our minds to.
Embrace your dreams, take steps towards them. Accomplish what you set out to do... because I know you can.
Hugs from Kris