Updated: Jan 10, 2020
Weight loss…such a buzz word, especially this time of year! 7+ years ago, I thought that losing the weight and fitting back into “those” jeans was the answer to all my problems, to finding happiness again.
As a mom of 3, I had always been a “yoyo dieter”, I was always on the lookout for the next quick fix, “the one” that would finally make all my dreams come true and make me look like someone else.
At the time, I wanted to be anybody but ME! Everyone else was “skinnier”, “prettier”, “happier”, “funnier…you get where I’m headed with this right?
I was constantly playing the comparison game, wondering why I just couldn’t seem to ever get to that magical place where I could finally love the reflection I was seeing in the mirror!
Instead I was constantly putting myself down, pulling myself apart and shredding any resemblance of self-esteem I had ever had. Those “thick thighs” did not look good in a bathing suit and “that nose of mine, well there ain’t no amount of working out that can fix that!” Those were the types of comments I had playing on repeat every time I stood in front of a mirror.
I finally decided that I was done taking the shortcuts in life and running in the direction of every shiny object that promised magical & rapid results. I decided I had finally had enough of all the deprivation, calorie counting and magical pills.
I started working out and I stuck with it, I became consistent and the weight started shedding. I got in the best shape of my life and although I was incredibly happy with the results, I still wasn’t HAPPY, because nothing was enough! It took time for me to figure it out, but with deep inner work, I finally did!
Me wanting to lose weight wasn’t truly about losing the weight. It was about me not feeling adequate. It was about me never feeling pretty enough. It was about me not feeling worthy enough. It was about me feeling threatened by every beautiful woman out there. It was about me never feeling smart enough.
It was about my lack of self-esteem and self-love. Losing the weight didn’t give me any of those things.
I realized that to truly be happy, I had to accept who I was and love myself exactly how I was. I had to embrace all of me. I had to let go of what I thought I should be or look like and be grateful for all that I was, all that I AM.
It hit me like a ton of bricks…I had struggled for so long trying to lose the weight because I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I was falling off the wagon and putting the weight back on, because subconsciously I didn’t believe I could do it!
How messed up is that???? I spent so many years unhappy & uncomfortable in my own skin, but that is no longer the case. I keep my ego in check and when it tries to creep up on me, I let it know where its place is at and that’s in check!
You see, I was my own worst enemy. I was the voice inside my head, telling me I wasn’t good enough and that I never would be.
Any of this ringing any bells? We’re not failing at weight loss; we’re failing at recognizing that there’s more to our unhappiness than the way we look!
That voice has been silenced because I no longer need her.
I have not only lost the weight and kept it off, but I’ve gained a hell of alota life! I’m not only in the best shape of my life, but I’m also the happiest and most aligned I’ve ever been.
Getting here wasn’t easy by any stretch of the imagination. It was a windy and bumpy road, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Along the way I found myself, my true self. I’ve dropped the old script and have created a new one. One where I get to be in control. One where I get to be totally in love with myself for who I am, not what I look like.
I’ve created a life where another woman’s beauty will never take away from mine. Another woman’s wisdom will not strip me of mine. Another woman’s strength will not diminish mine. You see…the only person I’m in competition with is myself. I strive to be a better version of myself day after day, after day.
I choose to show up fully and authentically, because that is truly the only way to do life at this point. I’ve evolved, I’ve grown, I’ve learned so much and love sharing it with the world.
Weight loss is just a cover up for something so much deeper. We must love ourselves unconditionally regardless of our shapes and sizes. We must stop wanting to work out to lose weight, but rather understand the value of our health.
How about you stop saying you want to lose weight and rather you’d like to gain life…an incredibly healthy and happy one at that???
Wouldn’t that shift your perception. Wouldn’t it release the pressure that you put on yourself to do it and do it fast? Wouldn’t you allow yourself the time to get there and commit to doing the work for however long it took, because you’d know without a doubt that happiness & health cannot be rushed.
If you loved yourself so much that no number on a scale would ever determine your worth again…wouldn’t that create a change in your mindset around this entire concept of weight loss????
I no longer workout or eat healthy to lose weight…I do those things for the quality of life they provide me.
I show up day in and day out for ME! I am diligent about shedding all that no longer serves me so that I can better serve the world, one beautiful soul at a time.
So, if you’re reading this and any of it resonates with you, please reach out. It’s a new era. One where we do things for evolved reasons. One where we get to do things our way, because we can!
I’m here to support, motivate and hold you accountable while watching you succeed at this thing called life!
Message me to find out how you can work with me and embark on the journey of a lifetime!
Love & light,