Janelle Alexis on Menopause, Midlife, and Finding Humor in the Chaos: Meet the Meno Posse

Menopause. Brain fog. Hot flashes. Sleepless nights. Missing words. And the occasional moment when you wonder whether your body has completely lost its mind.

For millions of women, perimenopause and menopause bring changes that can feel confusing, frustrating, and sometimes downright ridiculous. Yet despite how common these experiences are, many women enter this stage of life without knowing what to expect. Conversations happen quietly between friends, in doctors' offices, and sometimes in the most unexpected places, including the salon chair.

Author, entrepreneur, and international beauty educator Janelle Alexis believes it's time to turn up the volume on those conversations, preferably with a little laughter.

In her newest book, Meno Posse, Janelle brings her signature humor, honesty, and unapologetic personality to a subject that has been whispered about for far too long. Drawing from her own experiences, decades of conversations with women in her salon, and the unexpected challenges of navigating midlife, she invites readers into a community where nothing is too embarrassing to discuss and no woman has to feel alone.

But beneath the laughter is an important message about self-advocacy, confidence, resilience, and giving ourselves permission to change. From forgetting everyday words to navigating the loss of her mother while experiencing menopause herself, Janelle reminds us that midlife isn't simply about what our bodies are going through. It's also about discovering who we are becoming.

At Best Ever You, we believe that every stage of life offers opportunities for growth, connection, and a deeper understanding of ourselves. Sometimes that growth comes through difficult conversations. Sometimes it comes through unexpected challenges. And sometimes it comes with a hot flash and a really good sense of humor.

We are delighted to welcome Janelle Alexis for this candid, funny, and refreshingly honest conversation about menopause, reinvention, and why every woman deserves a posse of her own.

"Am I losing my mind, or is it menopause?"

Honestly? Both. Some days it is both before lunch.

I started having symptoms a couple of years ago and had no clue what was happening. Itchy ears. Ringing in my ears. Suddenly I needed glasses to read my own phone. I thought my body was just glitching. Nobody said the word "perimenopause" to me, and my mom never talked about it. Not once. In my family we talked about everything except the stuff that actually happens to you.

Then I am behind the chair at the salon, and client after client is telling me about the same things in a whisper, like it is a secret. And I thought, wait, we are ALL going through this and we are ALL acting like we are the only one? That is when I knew. If I am laughing about it with my clients and my girlfriends, I can put it in a book and let every woman in on the joke. That is the posse.

Tell us About Brain fog

Brain fog is when you walk into a room with total confidence and absolutely no idea why you are there. You just stand there like a screensaver.

I run three businesses, I am a mom, a wife, a dog mom to five dogs and a social media content creator. My whole life has been juggling a thousand details, and I was good at it. So, when words started just disappearing on me, it scared me.

The one that really got me was "fireplace." FIREPLACE. I could see it. I could describe it. The thing in the wall, with the fire, you hang stockings on it at Christmas. I am playing charades by myself. And the word would not come. I got so mad at myself, like, what in the world is wrong with me? Then my girlfriend says "fireplace" and just bursts out laughing, at me and with me. And I started laughing too.

That moment changed it for me. I stopped taking it as proof that I was slipping. Now when a word goes missing, I do not beat myself up. I describe it until somebody yells it out. It is a party game now. Menopause charades. I write things down, text myself, create pop ups on my calendar, I give myself grace, and if my glasses are on my head while I am looking for them, that is not a crisis. That is a chapter.

What surprised you most, and what do you wish someone had told you?

The hot flash. My first real one hit this year, right before my mom passed. I had no idea what it was. I literally felt like my vagina was on fire. I am not being dramatic; that is the only way to describe it. I was taking some peptides at the time, so I thought, okay, it is the peptides, I am having a reaction. Nope. That was menopause knocking on the door. Kicking it in full speed ahead.

And the timing of that was hard. I was losing my mom, and at the same time going through the exact thing she never told me about. I could not call her and ask.

What I wish someone had told me: it starts earlier than you think, it does not always look like hot flashes, and it is not all in your head. Itchy ears, ringing, sleep, mood, memory, libido, all of it can be connected. Talk to a doctor and ask the questions. And moms, talk to your daughters.

Why humor, and a moment that inspired the book?

Because if I do not laugh, I will cry, and then I will sweat, and then my mascara's ruined. Laughter is cheaper.

Humor takes the shame out of it. When you laugh about chin hairs or peeing a little when you sneeze, it stops being embarrassing and starts being something we share. The minute a woman laughs at a story in my book and thinks "oh my God, that's me," she is not alone anymore. That is the whole point.

There was a moment for me that was not funny at the time. I kept getting infections in my girl parts that would not go away. I had not done anything different. I had not done anything wrong. So naturally, I blamed my husband. My first book, Rose Colored Glasses, walks through my heartbreak, and also my rebuilding and the start of my personal pivot. So, after everything he had done, I was convinced my body was just staging a revolution. I had had my blood work done and everything came back "in range."

Then my doctor looks at me and says, "Your vagina atrophies." I'm sorry, my WHAT does WHAT? Great dinner conversation, by the way.

I am a very open person, so I listened, did what she told me, and started the vaginal estrogen cream. And now every time I learn something new at the doctor, I come home and tell my husband, purely for shock value. His reaction is always epic. I live for those moments. Truly. That is why humor matters. It took "my vagina is shrinking" and turned it into my favorite story to tell.

And the other moment that inspired the book? My mother calling me middle-aged. That is how the book opens. Nothing motivates you like your own mother reading you your age out loud.

How can women reconnect with their confidence and sense of identity during perimenopause and menopause, especially when their bodies and lives are changing in ways they never expected?

First, stop trying to get back to who you were at 30. She was cute. She is not coming back. And that is okay because she did not know half of what you know.

I tell women: get curious instead of critical. Your body is changing, so learn it again, like you are dating yourself. Find what makes you feel like you. For me that is a great blowout, a good lipstick, and a martini, which is why I am holding one on the cover.

And get around women who are going through it too. Confidence comes back faster when you realize nothing is wrong with you. You are just in the next chapter, and she has got a lot to say.

How has menopause changed your relationship with sleep, rest, and productivity, and what have you learned about giving yourself permission to slow down without feeling guilty?

I used to wear exhaustion like a badge. Up early, working out, teaching nationally and internationally on the weekends, salon all day, emails at midnight. Look how much I can do.

Menopause took that badge and threw it in the trash. When you are not sleeping, everything gets harder: your patience, your memory, your marriage, your ability to not cry in the Target parking lot.

So now rest is not a reward I earn when everything is done. Everything is never done. Rest is part of the job. I say no more. I take the nap. And I stopped apologizing for it. Slowing down isn't quitting. It's maintenance and to be honest it is what each one of us need to fully by present.

What should the people around us understand?

That we are not being dramatic. We are literally on fire sometimes.

I wish families and partners understood that it is physical, it is real, and it is not personal. If I snap, it is not that I do not love you, it is that I have not slept in three nights and my internal thermostat is broken.

For women, my advice is: say it out loud and say it simply. "I'm going through menopause. I need you to be patient with me right now, and here's what helps." You do not owe anybody an apology for your hormones. Hand them the book if you must. Highlight a chapter. That is what it is written for.

What decades behind the chair taught you?

The salon chair is the best therapy couch in the world. Women tell their hairstylist things they will not tell their doctor, their husband, or their best friend.

For years I have heard it all, from every kind of woman, every age, every background. And what I learned is that we are all going through the same things and every single one of us thinks she is the only one. That broke my heart a little, and it also lit a fire under me. A lot of the stories in Meno Posse are mine, and a lot of them come from my girlfriends and my clients. That is on purpose. This book belongs to all of us.

Women supporting women is not a slogan. It is how we survive this.

Many women feel pressure to keep everything together while navigating the physical and emotional changes of menopause. What advice would you give women who are struggling behind the scenes, and how can they learn to advocate for themselves and ask for the support they need?

Let me say it: you do not have to look perfect, act perfect, and pretend nothing is happening. That is exhausting, and you are already tired.

If you are struggling emotionally, that is not weakness. Your body is going through a massive change, and so is your heart. For me it came at the same time I was losing my mom, so believe me, I get it.

Advocating for yourself starts with taking yourself seriously. If your doctor brushes you off, find another doctor. Ask the questions. Write your symptoms down. Find your people, whether it is your girlfriends, a group online, or the women in your book club. And let somebody help you. Strong women ask for help. That is how we stay strong.

What would you tell women just starting out, and the big takeaway?

You are not crazy. You are not broken. And you are definitely not alone.

I would tell them what nobody told me: it can start sooner than you think, it shows up in weird ways, and it is okay to talk about it. Out loud. At brunch. In the salon chair. Wherever.

What I want readers to take away from Meno Posse is that you are part of a club you did not sign up for, but the members are fabulous. We are funny, we are wise, we are a little sweaty, and we have got each other. What you are going through does not define you. What defines you is what you do with it and how you help the next woman know she is not alone. So, grab a martini, grab your girlfriends, and grab the book. Welcome to the posse.

Finding Your People and Embracing Your Next Chapter

What makes Janelle Alexis's message so refreshing is her willingness to say out loud what so many women have been thinking quietly. Through Meno Posse, she reminds us that humor can create connection, honest conversations can replace embarrassment with understanding, and asking for help is a sign of strength rather than weakness.

Her experiences also speak to something much bigger than menopause. At every stage of life, we encounter changes we didn't anticipate, questions we don't immediately know how to answer, and moments when we have to rediscover our confidence. We may not be able to control every change that comes our way, but we can choose how we support ourselves and one another through it.

Perhaps one of the most important lessons in Janelle's story is that women need women. We need the friendships, conversations, encouragement, and shared laughter that remind us we don't have to navigate life's transitions in isolation.

And sometimes the most empowering words we can hear are simply, "Me too."

Thank you, Janelle, for bringing your humor, honesty, and heart to Best Ever You. Your willingness to share the funny, frustrating, and deeply personal realities of midlife is helping create the conversations so many women wish they'd had sooner.

About Janelle Alexis

Janelle Alexis is a Houston-based entrepreneur, international beauty educator, and author. She is the founder of Janelle Alexis Salon, Janelle Alexis Cosmetics, and the jewelry line Authentically Beautiful. Known across Houston as a blonde specialist and makeup artist, Janelle has built a career helping women look and feel their best.

Her books include the memoirs Rose Colored Glasses and Was It Worth It?, along with her newest release, Meno Posse, a laugh-out-loud girlfriend's guide to perimenopause and menopause. Through her writing, businesses, and social media presence, Janelle uses humor and personal experience to explore resilience, reinvention, confidence, and the realities of midlife. She lives in Houston with her family and five dogs.

Learn more about Janelle Alexis and her books at janellealexisofficial.com.

At Best Ever You, we celebrate the stories, experiences, and voices that inspire us to navigate change, embrace who we are, and become our best selves. Every story matters, and every conversation has the potential to help someone feel a little less alone.