Home for the Summer: 10 Real-Life Tips for When College Kids Come Back to the Nest

By Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino

The car pulls into the driveway. The trunk is full of laundry, the backseat is packed with snacks, and just like that—your house is full again. After months of independence, your college student is back home for the summer.

As a mom of four sons—each of whom has now graduated from college—I remember those summers well. At one point, we had six adults, two dogs, and three cats under one roof. The dishwasher never stopped running. The refrigerator door never quite closed. And the laundry room? Let’s just say it had its own ecosystem.

But what I remember most isn't the chaos—it’s the connection. The late-night conversations in the kitchen. The long walks that turned into heart-to-hearts. The joy (and occasional drama) of everyone trying to find their space—both literally and emotionally.

Those summers taught me more about parenting than any book ever could. If you’re navigating this season, here are ten lessons I learned that might help you create more peace, presence, and love in the mix.

1. Redefine What “Home” Means Now

Your college student isn’t the same person who left in the fall—and neither are you. Everyone’s grown a little. Maybe a lot.

So instead of expecting things to snap back to how they were, open the door (literally and emotionally) to what this version of home can become. Have a conversation early on:

• “What do you need this summer?”

• “How can we support each other?”

• “What would make this feel good for everyone?”

Home evolves. Let it grow with grace.

2. Embrace the Push-and-Pull (It’s Developmental!)

There were summers when I felt like I was living with highly opinionated roommates who came with their own schedules, Spotify playlists, and very strong feelings about leftovers.

But guess what? That friction was normal. It’s part of them individuating and testing their adult legs. Sometimes they needed independence. Sometimes they needed a hug. Sometimes both in the same 10-minute span.

Try not to take it personally. Breathe. Pause. Laugh when you can. And remember—it’s not always about you. It’s about them growing.

3. Create Shared Space and Private Space

When you’ve got six adults, two dogs, and three cats in one house, space becomes sacred.

Make sure everyone has a spot they can retreat to—whether it’s a bedroom, reading corner, or backyard hammock. And protect shared spaces with simple agreements:

• “If you make a mess, clean it up.”

• “If you borrow it, return it.”

• “If you're blasting music, wear headphones.”

Shared space works best when we honor each other’s need for personal peace.

4. Set Expectations Together

This was a big one for us. I learned quickly that saying, “This is how we do things here” didn’t land the same with a 21-year-old as it did when they were 15.

So instead, we started setting expectations together:

• Curfew? Let’s agree on mutual respect.

• Chores? Let’s divide them based on time and strengths.

• Meals? Let’s coordinate when we can actually eat together.

Co-creating the plan gave us fewer power struggles and more connection.

5. Be Clear About What’s Non-Negotiable

That said, it’s also okay to have boundaries and be clear about them.

In our house, kindness was non-negotiable. So was basic courtesy. If someone slammed a door or snapped at a sibling, we talked about it.

Let your kids know: “You’re an adult, and we respect that. But in this house, we treat each other with kindness.”

Boundaries build respect. And mutual respect builds peace.

6. Let Them Rest (and Recharge)

College is intense. Even if your student doesn’t talk much about it, know that the emotional and mental load of a school year is heavy.

Some summers, my sons needed time to just sleep, breathe, and be before they could even talk about jobs, internships, or what came next.

That pause is productive. It’s a form of healing. Allow them a little time to recalibrate. You’ll see their energy shift once they feel safe, seen, and supported.

7. Make Space for Meaningful Conversations

Some of our best talks didn’t happen during a “scheduled family meeting”—they happened over late-night bowls of cereal, on drives to the store, or while folding laundry.

Your college kids may not sit down for a heart-to-heart, but if you show up consistently and create safe pockets of time, they’ll open up in their own way.

Ask about their year. Their friends. What surprised them. What challenged them. Then listen—without jumping in to fix.

8. Laugh Together (Often)

Summer can be a circus. Embrace it. Make room for the mess and the memories.

Have family game nights. Watch ridiculous movies. Do an impromptu family lip-sync battle (yes, we did this—and yes, I still laugh about it). Make a meal together that’s a total disaster and end up ordering pizza.

Laughter is the glue that holds families together. Don’t take everything so seriously. Let joy win.

9. Allow for the “In-Between”

College students are not quite grown-ups—but they’re also not kids anymore. They live in this in-between space where they want independence but still sometimes need support.

This can be hard to navigate—but also a gift. It’s a rare time when your adult child is back under your roof but still willing to connect.

Allow for the awkwardness. The growth. The learning. Love them exactly where they are, without rushing them to be who they’re not yet.

10. Soak It All In

The truth? These summers are fleeting. Eventually, the house won’t be this full. The pets will nap in silence. The kitchen won’t echo with laughter at midnight.

So pause.

Soak it in.

Let the dishes wait once in a while. Put your phone down. Hug your kid a little longer than you need to.

These are the moments that live in your heart forever—not because they’re perfect, but because they’re real.

Thoughts from My House to Yours

To every parent welcoming their college kids home: I see you.

Whether you're navigating noise, nudging boundaries, or trying to sneak a moment of silence in the bathroom—you're doing beautifully.

You're not just managing a summer. You're holding space for growth, change, and connection.

The laundry might pile up. The fridge might empty daily. But the love? It expands.

And that love—along with a little humor and a whole lot of patience—is what truly makes a house a home.

Do you have tips or stories from your own summer with college kids?

We’d love to hear from you! Tag us @BestEverYou or use the hashtag #HomeForTheSummer #BestEverYou to connect, laugh, and grow through this wild and wonderful season—together.